January 2011
1 post
NEW TUMBLR →
not really gonna be using this one much anymore. only when im emo lolllll jk jk but seriously please go check out my new tumblr if you diggin beats!
i bet ur next girl wont do you as well as i did
i seriously hate everything right now
December 2010
9 posts
what is my passion
i have two in life
music
helping
both bring out inspiration. both require heart. thats what passion is right
even though ill never get to chase my dream of music, ill never give up my passion for helping people.
but maybe passion isnt the right word for it. maybe the correct term is greed, or selfishness. maybe im not really helpful, maybe im just lacking self esteem. maybe i just want to...
trust me
the more i say im ok„ the more im not ok
fake it till you make it
thats my motto…
its a tough life, acting happy
that is all.
now its safe
pretty sure no one will read this anymore. ive been gone quite a while haha.
you never even gave me a chance to help you or give you happiness. the truth is, i think i could do so much. i said you let me be myself around you, but i still have so much more to offer. all i have to offer is myself and for you to turn it down completely… well thats just a slap in the face. and ill admit, i wish...
October 2010
5 posts
i feel myself getting more and more lost each day
there are reasons i am the way i am. everyone always asks me to be more open and emotional, well fuck you. id say for the average person, im much much more trusting. i always believe that people are good even though i know its not always true. i lie to myself. i keep the pain coming. use me use me cuz you know ill give you a break. but ill never forget what you did to me even though ill definitely...
if i became deaf i would never love again
music is the only thing i love. its the only thing ill ever love.
what do you do when your best isnt enough?
i guess i just have to accept that ill never be good enough for you. but that doesnt mean ima stop trying :(
September 2010
3 posts
people need emotions
i dont know if i can do this anymore.
my last post
at least for a while.
after conducting my research and gathering enough evidence ive come to my final conclusion
love does not exist
August 2010
1 post
look to recreate →
July 2010
4 posts
it starts now
i decided, well, i think i might start deleting myself off the internet. and by that i mean my blogs and notes on facebook or whatever. i thought that maybe introverted thoughts are meant to be kept inside your head. i dont want to define myself through any other means than by you sitting in front of me and seeing for yourself.
im NOT, however, planning to get rid of everything. i wanna keep up...
day 9: someone you wish you could meet
this ones easy.
dear grandma:
im sorry i cant write this in japanese. not right now. because you know already, how much i would have liked to know you. and so im not really writing this for you. but im writing it for everyone else, to see what an amazing person you were.
born and raised in japan, in a fairly well off family. educated, beautiful, talented. and then the war. after the war, you...
it was a great weekend
i wish it didnt have to end. but luckily, its given me a state of mind that usually takes me a lot of time and drugs to achieve. and i didnt need either.
im still uneasy, but at least im happy
June 2010
21 posts
TIMMAYYYYY!: Without A Title. →
jessebarrera:
Not every woman wants to be in a relationship. Some just want good company. Someone to vibe with, converse with, laugh with & make funny faces at. Not every woman is in a rush. Start off simple & let the rest find itself. Because in all honesty, having someone to talk to & feeling comfortable around them. It’s a beautiful & good feeling. Minds connecting. Both on...
the living arrangement
me: did i tell you that im living with kenji next year
david cheng: hahahaha!
david cheng: you guys are gonna be so fucked up
haircuts
carolbarrel:
dangmustang:
i like ‘em. I mean I REALLY enjoy getting haircuts. Obviously I go too far sometimes but hey, WHY NOT?! At least I can say I know what I look like with “boy hair”. Today was the second time during work that I’ve been approached to be someone’s “hair model”. it’s just fancy words for “let me cut your hair so I can graduate”. The first time I totally backed out. Now I’m...
no words
the way i cried today, alone while not alone, was the saddest ive felt in a very, very long time. im not bitter or upset that you werent there because im the one that didnt do anything about it. and im not upset because i learned that its okay to trust someone, and to think that they wont be upset with you for seeking their help.
still, the loneliness i felt today, it was haunting
May 2010
6 posts
i hate how
so many things in life are inevitable and you do nothing to avoid them.
i feel myself becoming empty
THE INDEPENDENT (U.K.): The first volume of Mark... →
inothernews:
Exactly a century after rumours of his death turned out to be entirely accurate, one of Mark Twain’s dying wishes is at last coming true: an extensive, outspoken and revelatory autobiography which he devoted the last decade of his life to writing is finally going to be published.
The creator of Tom Sawyer, Huckleberry Finn and some of the most frequently misquoted catchphrases ...
stupid.
im so mad at myself
i feel a little better after i realized this
i was looking through all the pictures of homes that i wish i could live in in the future, things i might have been able to own, in general the life that i could have lived. if i had just spent this much more time studying, or stayed in that one day to study instead of going out with my friends, maybe i would have gotten better grades. which might have led me to get a better job, make more money,...
i figured out part of it
it makes me sad how few people out there think the way or as often as i do. thats always been and always will be my major flaw. but when i do occasionally meet someone that has the same thought process, its so soothing and so relaxing. and very comforting. it puts my soul at ease to know that there are SOME people out there that appreciate the sunset and how it happens every day no matter what...
why yes, i have been in a hole
why are people so disappointing? and when did i start caring so much?
ummm, fuck this. thanks.
but ill never stop believing that some day someone is going to prove me wrong about humans. that some day someone will show me that humanity exists on a larger scale.
but i also definitely feel that belief starting to fade.
what a sad feeling this is.